Mundane Monday – 11/1/10

Wow. It’s November. (Just call me Ms. Obvious.) I’d say something deep and meaningful about how time flies, but…yeah. I got nothin’.

I have to type fast, because it’s 10:22 and as you know, this week I turn into a pumpkin at 11:00. Or possibly a butternut squash. Something in that squash family. Why do we even say turn into a pumpkin? It’s not like Cinderella turned into a pumpkin. Her coach, yes, but people don’t say, “I have to go; my car turns into a pumpkin at 11:00.” No, it’s “I turn into a pumpkin.”

Wait, what was I saying? Oh, yeah. Something about being short on time. Whoops.

Here’s a few things that made my week great!

• Car and I went to the temple on Saturday. When we were done, we went to lunch at a place where someone brought the food to us. I know, right? It was almost like a date or something!
• Today I called my friend Sara, but she didn’t pick up and her voice mail kicked in. Big G heard the start of the message, which led to a discussion about how voice mail works, etc. He asked why I didn’t leave a message, and I explained that I needed an immediate answer to something, but since she didn’t answer, I wouldn’t leave a message. He said, “But I have something to ask her.” Umm….okay…”What were you going to ask her?” “About cement mixers.”
• Car took Big G trick or treating because I had a migraine. He’s a nice husband.
• Big G’s school had their Halloween program. Unlike last year, which involved Big G dressed like Batman and skulking about in a menacing manner, this year’s program featured Big G dressed like Batman and actually singing!
• It snowed last week.
• Big G saw the snow on Mt. Timpanogos and said, “Whoa! Mt. Fuji!”
• I slept 8.5 hours last night.

On that note, I’m off to bed. After all, at 11:00 my bed turns into a pumpkin.

Mundane Monday – 10/25/10

I’ve been a bad blogger. I randomly skip posts and don’t even explain what happened. (Hint: it mostly involves falling asleep on the couch.) But look! Here I am! All ready to post about awesomeness!

If you feel so inclined, let me know what made your week great.

• I was running late for work on Saturday and asked Car to pack some yogurt and granola for my breakfast. He put them in separate little containers so the granola wouldn’t get soggy.
• Little G has a new phrase. It goes a little something like this: “Little G, should we change your diaper?” “No way!” Seriously, it’s adorable.
• I don’t have pneumonia. I know, that doesn’t sound like a positive thing, but trust me, since I currently have yet another respiratory infection, I’ll take whatever I can get. Although I could do without the coughing until I vomit, but whatever.
• Speaking of my respiratory infection, right now my singing voice sounds like Lucinda Williams. I need to go record something, quick!
• It snowed! Yes, that means it’s getting cold and icky, but it is awfully pretty on the mountains.
• The primary program was this past Sunday. For you non-Mormon readers, primary is pretty much Sunday School for little kids, and once a year they put on a program that involves songs and a little speaking part for each kid. Some of you may recall Big G’s graduation performance. I will say this about Big G’s performance on Sunday: at least he didn’t have a hat with a tassel. Also, he managed to compress the line, “I will try to live like Jesus Christ every day” into about two syllables, which was an admirable feat.
• I had another good quarterly meeting with my licensing board. Ergo, I can still count pills and sell drugs. Hurrah!
• We carved jack-o-lanterns tonight. I really don’t like carving pumpkins, but I have to admit I was vastly amused by Big G’s insistence that his pumpkin have…wait for it…four different faces. It’s quite the jack-o-lantern. I’ll have to post pictures when they’re downloaded. I was going for an angry pumpkin, but I’m pretty sure it just ended up looking sardonic.

That’s it for today. Thanks for being patient with me as I try to stay awake long enough to blog.

Now excuse me while I go cough up a lung. Good times.

Mundane Monday 10/11/10

I’m going to start with the best part of my week, which deserves bold type:

We finally closed on our refinance!

The extra $250 a month is a wee bit happy-making.

Oh, and don’t forget to tell me what made your week great—it’ll make mine even better.

• You may have noticed I went to Albuquerque with my mom and kids.
• There were balloons.
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• Some of them glowed
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• Some reminded me of Lindsay Lohan. (I’m not explaining that one. If you get the reference, you rock my world.)

• There were fireworks.

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• Plus other things that lit up the night.
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It was a good week.

Mundane Monday – 10/4/10

Short list this week—I’ve got a to-do list a mile long. I know, lousy excuse, but there it is. Don’t forget to leave me a comment letting me know what made your week great!

• I’m going to Albuquerque on Wednesday to visit my brother and go to the Balloon Fiesta. Okay, no, it hasn’t happened yet, but I’m really excited, and that’s made this past week great. Crazy, but great!
• Little G beaned Big G upside the head with a baseball. No, that’s not the awesome thing. I’m not that big a jerk. But immediately afterward, he said, “Sowwy” and looked genuinely contrite. It was adorable, despite Big G’s belief to the contrary.
• We drove the Nebo Loop on Saturday. I know, this whole “drive the canyons” deal is starting to be a thing with us. I teared up at the beauty that God placed on this earth for us. Breathtaking.

• I read “Renewal,” an amazing post about motherhood by La Yen over at El Paso Represent Yo. Seriously, y’all, go read it. Well worth your time.
• Someone on Twitter called me a troll when I retweeted a silly, somewhat sacrilegious comment about LDS General Conference. It made me giggle. Dude, I’m a Mormon. I get to make those jokes. It’s called a sense of humor. You should look into that.
• I learned how to spell sacrilegious. Totally not how it sounds. Stupid English language.

My life is awesomely ordinary.

Mundane Monday – 9/27/10

Leave a comment at the end about what made your week great, won’t you? It makes me happy and stuff.

• Today I took the boys to a new park, complete with splash pad. They had a fantastic time and I got to chat with friends!

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• We drove up Payson Canyon tonight. On our way home, two bear cubs ran across the road in front of our car. Amazing.
• Little G emerged from his “eating Grandma’s blood pressure pill” experience unscathed. I’ve lost 10 years from my life, but at least he’s okay.
• There was something small and brown on my carpet. I was concerned, until Big G told me, “I think it’s a nut.” I pick it up (with a tissue—I’m not an idiot) and it’s some kind of seed from a tree or something, and it does look like a nut. Big G sniffed it, then said, “It must be a dirty small nut. It smells like my big nuts!”
• I apparently will have a weekly story that involves me giggling like an adolescent when Big G uses the word “nuts.”

My life is amazingly mundane.

Mundane Monday – 9/20/10

The past week brought a lot of laughs. Some tears, but I only wrote down the laughs, because that’s what this post is about.

• Big G was in the kitchen, drawing on a piece of butcher paper. When he was finished, he came out and said, “You need to see my drawing, mom!” I walked toward the kitchen, only to be told, “You have to pay to see my drawing.” He then handed me his library card and told me I could use it to pay. He even showed me how to swipe it through the entertainment center.
• Tonight we drove up the canyon to see the changing leaves. Only, they aren’t really changing at that level yet. But that’s okay, because we had a lot of fun as a family and we even got a close-up view of some deer, which thrilled the kids. According to Big G, “That was a fun adventure!”
• I spent time with my hilarious Robinson cousins. I don’t see them often enough.
• My mom and I mocked her GPS unit as it tried to guide us out of the cemetery after DeVere’s funeral. Apparently we made it angry, because after that it gave her the silent treatment, GPS-style (i.e. telling her to turn about three seconds before an intersection). For some reason, that was really, really funny at the time.
• The Relief Society bulletin had an item listed about some humanitarian service we provided, only one of the instances was spelled “Hunanitarian.” I spent the rest of the hour contemplating a good definition. I might settle on “Magnanimous person of Chinese descent.”
• Our ward is collecting items for the local food bank. They also need personal hygiene items, including “diapers for babies.” I guess I won’t be giving them a box of Depends. (Seriously, folks. These are the things I sit and giggle about during church. I know. It’s pathetic.)
• We went to a pirate-themed birthday party for an 8-year-old. Little G spent the rest of the night saying, “arrrr” and Big G insisted upon wearing his pirate hat to bed.
• Big G announced, “Turkey is a long way away, mom.” Since he and Car had been reading about volcanoes, I assumed he was thinking about that, until he announced, “It’s a long ways to see Drew.” Aha. Drew is his cousin in Albuquerque.
• Big G was hilarious this week. On Saturday he saw some kids on the sidewalk as we drove past, and yelled out the window, “HI! I’M FIVE!” Then this morning he said, “Karson is my boyfriend.” Of course, he meant his friend who’s a boy, but I still giggled because I’m mature like that.

My life is superbly mundane.

Mundane Monday – 9/13/10

Why does this post always fall on the days I’m in a lousy mood and want to be snarky? Yeah, yeah, I get the message. Fine. Life is all sunshine and rainbows and unicorns. Whatever.

Read about the origin of Mundane Monday. If you care.

So, yeah. When you’re done reading, tell me what made your week great. Or not. Whatever.

• Big G has been wearing underwear all week and it’s actually going really well, as long as we don’t count today. Also, I told him to “listen to his body” to know if he needs to go, and he took it literally. Every time I ask him what his body is saying, he puts his hand on his ear and pauses. You know, like he’s listening. Awesome.
• I had the following exchange with Sara from Saving For Someday (@savingforsomeday) on Twitter:
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  This, friends, is why you never tweet after 10 pm.

• My rheumatologist’s office called with the results from my semiannual visit. In the words of the nurse, “Your test results are stable.” I thought that was hilarious. Obviously my test results aren’t “normal.” If they were normal, I wouldn’t be seeing a rheumatologist twice a year.
• I tried to explain the humor in using the word “stable” to the nurse. I’m pretty sure she’s made a notation in my medical records about how lame I am.
• Last week I called Car’s work and inadvertently called his boss “babe.”
• Car’s boss didn’t realize I’d called him “babe” until Car felt compelled to enlighten him.
• Car is apparently kind of a jerk.

This one is my favorite, so it gets its own special paragraph based on hilarity:

Tonight Big G had some poop issues. I’m not going to detail those, because I want you to keep reading my blog. Anyway, I asked him if he was having tummy troubles.

Big G: No, mom. It’s just ass.
Me: Excuse me?
Big G: It’s ass.
Me: What was that?
Big G: It’s poop ass.

At this point I was a bit concerned. Where did he learn that? I’m no paragon of perfection, but I’m pretty sure I’ve managed to keep my language pretty clean around the boys. Still, it’s really hard to be serious when you’ve got a 5-year-old telling you something is “poop ass,” but I managed to keep it together. I’m a great mom like that.

Me: Try that one more time.
Big G: Mom! It’s poop ass!

And then the light bulb went on in my brain. See, Big G speaks, for the most part, very clearly. That makes it easy for me to forget the little problem he occasionally has with the “sh” sound.

Me: It’s…poop ash?
Big G: Yes! It’s poop ass!
Me: Ash.
Big G: Ass.
Me: ASH.
Big G: ASSSSH.

Good enough. Right now you’re probably wondering what poop ash is. I have no good answer to that question, so I’ll just leave it to your imagination.

My life is overflowing with mirth, but still pretty average.
That’s okay by me.

Mundane Monday – 9/6/10

I’m sick. Like, my sinuses might explode sick. I can’t sleep because of the coughing, either. So if this post is a little bit short or, say, not as uplifting as usual? I blame my upper respiratory tract.

As always, tell me what made your week great–it always makes my week even better!

• Big G turned 5.
• Big G stopped wearing pull-ups. Can I get a “hallelujah”? He even made it through 3 hours of church with no accidents. (We’ll ignore what happened today.)
• Little G continues to be vastly entertained by using the potty. I’m trying not to get my hopes up.
• We had an awesome party for Big G at grandma and grandpa’s house. He loved his presents, and the kids got to beat the crap out of a fish. In piñata form, of course.
• My sister-in-law accepted a job offer that lands their family in St. George. Only 4 hours away from me!
• Car took the kids to the park today to give me a break. When they came back, Big G had his hands hidden behind his back. “Guess what I have?” I guessed unsuccessfully about five times, and then he held out acorns he’d collected at the park. Cute, right? Sadly, I have the maturity of a 12-year-old boy, so I giggled all afternoon at the following: “Mom, can you hold my nuts?” “Mom, how many nuts do I have?” “Mom, I need to wash my nuts! They have to be clean!”

My life is hilariously mundane.

Mundane Monday – 8/30/10

Don’t forget to tell me what ordinary things made your week great. Seriously, that part always makes me smile. I’ve been tempted to do away with my touchy-feely Monday posts, but then I wouldn’t get to hear all about your lives!

This week:

• Little G pooped in the potty! I know half of you don’t care, but trust me when I say this is a huge deal around here (after all, Big G, who turns 5 on Sunday, still wears a pull-up).
• Our refinance seems to actually be moving forward.
• Big G had a good follow-up with the (really cute) neurologist. Stop judging me. I’m allowed to enjoy the view.
• I picked up an extra shift at work. (Does anyone want to watch my boys?)

That’s all I can think of right now. I’d write more, but I’m already pushing the time on this post. Pretty soon it’ll be Tuesday, and we’ll be one day closer to (insert dramatic music) the end of the pull-up era!

I did mention that Big G said he’d stop wearing pull-ups when he’s 5, right? And that his birthday is this Sunday? Yeah. You could say I’m a teeny bit excited. You could also say the Great Wall of China is a teeny bit long.

My life is stunningly average.

*Hey, WordPress Proofreader! You may have noticed I gave you a nice little break. I’m pretty awesome like that. But today? You are back on my persona non grata list for questioning the validity of the word “pooped.”

Mundane Monday – 8/23/10

It’s been a rough week for the Smiths (my family, not the band). Still, there were moments that certainly deserve to be celebrated:

• Little G went pee in the potty. Three different times. At this rate, he might be potty-trained before Big G.
• Today was Big G’s first day back at preschool. In his words, “Mom, I missed school when I wasn’t there.”
• Our home appraisal went really well.
• When I say, “I love you” to Little G, he tries really hard to say, “I love you too.” It sounds nothing like that, but he’s trying!
• I’ve picked up an extra 6 hours a week at work. Now to find someone who can watch my boys…

What made your week great?

*No, WordPress Proofreader, I didn’t mean weak. I meant week. Jerk.