3 05 2011

Sometimes an element of cheese creeps into Mormonism that brings out my snarky side. I know! Try to contain your astonishment.

A couple of weeks ago I was typing the ward bulletin and ran across an announcement for an upcoming activity that provoked this tweet:

I may have also turned to Car and told him I’d rather shoot myself in the foot than attend this activity.

Fast forward two weeks. A member of the Relief Society presidency tracked me down at church and pinned me down with the look. If you’re involved in any sort of organized group—religious or secular—that relies upon volunteer efforts, you know the look. It’s the “I’m about to ask you to do something” look. I’ve been on the giving end of the look enough times that I try to be amenable to whatever request is made. Also, the ability to say no is not exactly my strongest quality. You might have noticed that about me.

Anyway, this was the look of “Please do the music at this special activity in a week and a half. Oh, and can you work up a musical number?”


A few things:

  1. Someone in my ward is stalking me on Twitter.
  2. Or possibly they’ve bugged my house.
  3. Apparently if I don’t want to attend, I really will have to shoot myself in the foot.
  4. Clever move, God.
  5. I’mma need me a roofie to forget this one. Anyone?

Car saw me looking through my music and raised an eyebrow. “You know that activity I said I’d rather shoot myself in the foot than attend? They asked me to do the music.”

The man smirked. And chortled. There might have even been a slight guffaw mixed in. I’d call him a jerk, but let’s be honest—if the roles were reversed, I’d be on the floor, helpless with laughter. This is why our marriage works.

So, my friends, it appears next week I’ll have an unforgettable night. I know you’re every bit as excited as I am. I’d live stream my musical performance, but gosh darn it, it’s in the chapel and I’m pretty sure that wouldn’t be kosher. You’ll just have to use your imaginations.

On second thought, don’t do that. I forgot for a minute what a bunch of pervs y’all are, and I don’t want God to smite you.

You’re welcome.




4 responses

4 05 2011
anne garrett addison

You must admit, that God has a sense of humor. One night I was out having a cocktail with a girlfriend and I informed her that I was “officially” done with drama. I was so over drama. Naturally, as I drove home, I drove over unseen construction debris. Blew out BOTH left tires, stranded me just around the bend on a blind curve on the on ramp to the freeway in pouring rain on a Friday night. I called then boyfriend who didn’t want to come get me (the whole mile away) because it was raining (ya-think?!) and suggested I call AAA. So I did and naturally, when the tow-truck showed and I dared to exit my vehicle, I locked my keys in the car. Yeah. “And God Laughed” should be on my bumper sticker. Funny guy.

4 05 2011

Love it! I even hated going to them when I was Relief Society President! Now that I’ve been released, I hide in the Primary room!

4 05 2011

*snicker* *snicker* *chortle* *guffaw*

😀 😀 😀

3 05 2011

Oh I remember that look. Oh do I.

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