An Open Memo to My Beloved Children

2 04 2011

This is mom:

Mom is under the covers. Mom is asleep. When you talk to mom right this moment, she is likely to say things like, “Go away,” and “Go find your father,” or possibly even “I hear fries.” (Don’t ask.)

This is dad:

Dad is in the kitchen. Dad is awake. Dad will get you a waffle and milk. Dad will find toys to play with or cartoons to watch.

Mom will make unintelligible noises and demand the door remain closed.

Dad will put cinnamon and sugar on your waffle.

Why are you still in Mom’s room?

When I tell you to go away, it’s really for your own safety. You’ll just have to trust me on that one.

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6 responses

5 04 2011
Andrea

I sometimes wish for a secret room in my house that the kids don’t know about that I can hide in. Because they won’t leave me alone in the bedroom, and don’t even get me started on what happens when I attempt to use the bathroom.

4 04 2011
Annette

Let us know that works for ya. My kids could use an open memo.

3 04 2011
andygirl

kids just like to take their lives in their own hands, don’t they?

2 04 2011
Rachel

Mom, can you get me some water?”. “um, daddy is in the kitchen RIGHT NEXT TO THE SINK! I am in the bathroom”. “oh”.

2 04 2011
danessa

heee hee hee hee. Oh my goodness. I think I will have to perma link this…if only for the expression on Car’s face….

2 04 2011
Cecily R

Hahahahaha! I am SO with you on this one!!

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