First Impressions

13 06 2010

I’m not bipolar, but my blog is. I’ll continue my addiction story–probably tomorrow–but tonight I need a break. I’m sure y’all understand and will stay tuned.

I’m not a political strategist.

I know, right? It’s hard to believe, but I’ve never orchestrated a campaign for office. Having said that, I’m guessing what holds true for the rest of us also holds true for political candidates–namely, you never get a second chance to make a first impression. It’s a cliché, but for good reason.

When making up a campaign leaflet, it’s probably best to show it to a few people. Maybe even people from different generations with varied backgrounds. Of course, if that happened, I wouldn’t have found this on my front porch today:

I was going to blur out his name, but he's a political candidate so I figure he's fair game.

Yeah, my house is a mess and apparently the lens on my phone’s camera needs cleaning. Also, I have man hands. Stop judging me. Let’s focus on the important element here:

Does that slogan sound familiar to anyone, or was I the only person watching late-night infomericals in the 90s? Let me jog your memory:

I know you hate me for making you watch that, but it had to be done to further your understanding of why I’m so perplexed by this leaflet. Go ahead and watch it again, and when you come back, let me know if that’s someone you want associated with your political campaign. Bonus points: I live in ultra-conservative Utah County, and Susan Powter is gay. For some reason, that makes this about 50 times funnier to me. I’m pretty sure Mr. Bridgewater didn’t intend people to think of a crazy lesbian with a buzz cut when he ok’d this leaflet.

Of course, I could be wrong. If I am and that was Tim Bridgewater’s plan from the get-go, I am totally voting for him.

*I have such great conversations in my house since I started blogging. Car brought that leaflet in with the mail and as soon as I saw it, I whipped out my phone.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m taking a picture! This is awesome!
“Why are you taking a picture?”
“So I can blog about this. It makes me laugh.”
“Soooo…I shouldn’t throw it away, then?”

We had a similar conversation about the perverse animal cookies. In fact, I didn’t take a picture of them when I first took them out of the bag and I spent the next few days extremely paranoid that Car might eat them before I recorded their shame.

**The WordPress proofreader has never seen an infomercial. How sad.

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7 responses

16 06 2010
rachel

ok, there are more flaws in this leaflet than i have time to enumerate. i’ll choose one. since when is it a bad thing for a lawmaker to be a lawyer? i’d say it’s probably an advantage when you’re, oh, say, making laws. this is why i can’t be a member of any political party. too many morons.

13 06 2010
Cecily

I love reading you (your blog, but since it’s all of you I get, it IS you). I laugh and cry, smile and giggle, ache and “amen.” Thanks for the year-o-blogging.

13 06 2010
Jenny

That means a lot coming from someone who’s known me as long as you have! I’m glad you’re along for the ride.

13 06 2010
Alicia

Okay, I am the “ultra-conservative” (at least that is what some of Dan’s family thinks), and this guy’s ad campaign BUGS me! To the point that I told Dan I don’t think I can vote for the guy. Who is going to take him seriously. For a businessman he sure didn’t know how to surround himself with people smarter than himself for his campaign! Gag.

14 06 2010
Jenny

But he’s not a lawyer, so we should totally vote for him! I really don’t get it. This is why (GASP!) I never vote. They all just piss me off.

13 06 2010
Aimee

LOL! I totally recognized it before you explained it. Seriously, some of the things people put on adverts make milk come out of my nose. 🙂

13 06 2010
talesofmy30s

Where’s his pledge to get Congress to lose weight? 😉

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