Get Off My Lawn!

26 04 2010

In case you’re wondering, I am wearing pants tonight. I’m sure you’re all kinds of relieved.

I live across the street from a high school.  Today, as I pulled weeds (I know! I think I have some kind of neurological condition that’s completely changing my personality.), I took a moment to observe the high school kids across the street and spent the rest of the day humming “I’m Glad I’m Not Young Anymore.” (It’s from Gigi, people. If you didn’t know that, it’s time to brush up on your 1950s musicals. Also? Stop judging me.)

The one thing I hate about living across the street from the high school is the amount of trash that blows into our yard. Apparently none of the students understand the purpose of a garbage can, which brings me to the moment I realized I’m an old fart: I actually considered collected all the garbage from my yard for a month and taking it to the high school administration.

Holy crap. I’m pretty sure the next step is to start spraying kids with a hose every time they pass my house. That actually sounds kind of awesome. I might just enjoy this whole “getting old” thing.

*Even WordPress knows Gigi. Is WordPress smarter than you?

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8 responses

29 04 2010
Peter

It’s inevitable. I have a 15-yr-old home teaching companion who busily texts his friends on our way to appointments. I totally feel like a grumpy old man as I ask him about how many of his friends have those thingamajiggers, and how do the teachers deal with it, as I internally grump about how kids these days just don’t understand how it used to be and we didn’t need no stinkin’ cell phones when I was in high school.

*sigh*

28 04 2010
Pearl

I would LOVE to see you spray the kids with your hose as they walked across your lawn! That would be hilarious!

28 04 2010
danessa

HEY!!! Where’s my daily dose of Jenny? Hope you are doing ok! *Ness

27 04 2010
Amber

I live behind the elementary school. Across the street from that is the jr. high school. Apparently the people who lived in our house before us let their yard be a ‘cut through’ for practically anyone who felt like it (despite the fence surrounding the yard). I had three different neighbors ‘inform’ me of this and ‘make sure’ it was okay with me before moving in. I informed them that it was not okay and promptly locked the back gate. I’m a jerk like that. We still have kids try to jump our fence (and I yell at them) and have kids at football practice climb on the fence for fun (I yell at them too).

I love being old and grouchy.

27 04 2010
rachel

i’ve seen high school kids pick fruit off of my trees and walk through my garden on the way home from school. i’ll start spraying them with the hose if you do it.

27 04 2010
danessa

yep. Old Fart to be sure. I get that way. Why is it that while you are attending High School you KNOW that you are AWESOME. Old people (meaning anyone over 25) are lame and grumpy, and you are completely oblivious to the fact that your actions have consequences.
I too am guilty at yelling at them…for many reasons. It would be easier if they weren’t so…well….teenagerish. 😉

27 04 2010
Erika Hill

I love to read the F Minus comic strip, especially ones featuring an old man who wears the shirt “World’s Worst Grandpa.” I think my favorite comic ever features this Grandpa and a group of costumed little people. The Grandpa is saying, “Trick,” and is hosing down the kids. That’s what I think of whenever someone even says “hose” now. So…I don’t know why I wanted to share that, but I did. Do what you will with it.

27 04 2010
Sherry

I feel your pain! Just being a few houses away we get the trash and the trash talkin’ young hooligans in our neck of the woods as well. I’ve yelled at them for crossing my lawn (which is fenced for a reason), for running the stop sign, and using foul language in front of my kids. Love your idea with the hose. Perhaps we could both sit on our porches and hose the high school kids…too bad the police station is so close! 🙂

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